We decided to take the plunge. We decided to finally meet the couple we had been communicating with online to figure out if we were a match. I kept asking myself, should I be a gestational surrogate mother or a traditional surrogate. Would I be able to essentially give up my own biological child? I knew right from the start that I viewed it as a gift. I wasn't having anymore children so how would this be my child? This was a promise, a gesture preconception. A vow that I would be taking with people I hadn't even met yet. Did we have the same values? I had a million questions for them, as I'm sure they did for us. I felt in a way that this was my plan. I had to move forward with this, It seemed almost visceral, as if this wasn't my choice to make at all. Women who have given birth understand that when labor really starts, there's no turning back. This force inside your body takes over, with every contraction your one step closer to becoming a mother. But, that inner tightening, that was all you could think about, how do I possibly get through another one of these? Control was out, this was something that was moving forward, like it or not. Then it's over and their's a babe in your arms. That was it, something I couldn't turn back from, I was going to be a surrogate mother. That sums up my pre-surrogacy existence.
We met at our home. They came all bright eyed and hopeful. They seemed to look as if they were stepping into a world that they never knew. She (I won't be using real names to protect anonymity) was on the short side, with short black hair. I thought "clearly she's a business lady" she was dressed as if she were walking into the most important interview of her life. I guess it was. He was also on the short side, balding gray hair. He looked like a professor at an ivy league college. They were both professional people. He was a doctor, she worked in the growing computer industry. They came with no short of 100 questions for us.
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